There have been a few times when I've declared it the worst week of my life. First time was the week I lost my grandfather, celebrated a birthday and lost Brian to a year in Korea. Second time was waiting for Brian to make it home after being shot in Iraq. And now, I wait to see if I will be the mother of a little girl, fulfilling more than a decade of adoption dreams...or not.
Sarah signed the paperwork today, but asked to not participate in the adoption ceremony. My mood seems to depend on the mood of my social worker, and Andra was cautious, to say the least. The deadline for a change of mind is Tuesday midnight. If she doesn't change her mind by then, we will go up to Raleigh and pick up "our Libby." She is currently at the interim home. I am thoroughly depressed right now, but at least I'm getting fed very well now that Mom's in town.
I could change my mind and go get her tomorrow, but I think this will be good. I'm so emotional about this already, and I haven't even met her. I would like the first time I see her to be completely free of doubt. Then it will be pure joy, mixed with no amount of reservation. Then I will be able to introduce Sam to his little sister with no "maybes." It will be one very sweet moment.
Please pray for Sarah. She hasn't broken down yet, but she will, and it's going to suck.
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2 comments:
Oh Kathie, I can't even imagine the range of emotions you've been feeling.
I hope this week goes by fast. I hope the best for Sarah, and of course Libby.
Love ya friend.
Today's Saturday. Four days and counting! Mrs. A.rende
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